Team Wellness Advisory Committee: Self-Esteem No. 4

Difficult people are difficult because they fear change.

Negative emotions also result from the fear of change.


What rules of emotional conduct must you consciously use as a change-expert to master negative emotions? Use the following seven Rules of Emotional Order to contradict programming that leaves you filled with negative emotions:


Rule #1: every feeling has something worthwhile to teach you

Be Feeling: Our society is obsessed with feeling good and being positive all the time.

Be Vulnerable: Rule #1 attempts to reverse anti-feeling programming.

Be Who You Really Are: Stop trying to get rid of painful emotions.


Rule #2: your changes will always affect you the most

Be Thought-Full: Our society is obsessed with making changes to please others.

Be Vulnerable: This rule attempts to reverse anti-individuality programming.

Be Who You Really Are: Stop thinking good changes hurt others more than they help you.


Rule #3: take risks to grow and change

Be Open to Change: Our society is obsessed with being secure and avoiding failure.

Be Vulnerable: This rule attempts to reverse anti-change programming.

Be Who You Really Are: Stop believing that thinking alone is sufficient to solve a problem.


Rule #4: trying to control every event in life causes unnecessary anger

Be Self-Controlled: Our society is obsessed with trying to control our thoughts and feelings to influence our decisions.

Be Vulnerable: This rule attempts to reverse anti-vulnerability programming.

Be Who You Really Are: Stop trying to be responsible for everything.


Rule #5: responsible anger is healing, not hurtful

Be One of a Kind: Our society is obsessed with fitting in and not causing a fuss.

Be Vulnerable: This rule attempts to reverse anti-intimacy programming.

Be Who You Really Are: Stop making anger the bad guy.


Rule #6: being an imperfect human being is good enough

Be at your Imperfect Best: Our society is obsessed with physical, psychological, and spiritual perfection.

Be Vulnerable: Rule #6 attempts to reverse anti-learning programming.

Be Who You Really Are: Stop living with decisions that decrease your self-esteem.


Rule #7: your choices always remain your own to make

Be Feeling: Our society is obsessed with making right decisions.

Be Vulnerable: This rule attempts to reverse anti-decision programming.

Be Who You Really Are: Stop living with decisions that decrease your self-esteem.


You are constantly being exposed to programming that pressures you to dismiss your feelings instead of experiencing them. Learn from your emotions and entrust your feelings to loved ones. Be free to feel OK even when you are feeling down. Don’t let negative emotions affect your self-worth. Boost your self-esteem when your charge is low. Dr. Dennis O'Grady